Do you know what close means? Does it mean a display? Does it mean disconnection? No. It means permanence. And that is why I’m asking.
Kmkmaajaj is equal to ‘it’s odd how that works.’ How many letters does it take to reveal a name? Probably not nine.

The clouds are still fighting. My legs are still crossed.

There are a lot of rectangles in my room.

OK – SEND – CLR – END

i wish i had more time to write. i think it would do me well. i feel like i’ve said that before.

i am leaving to go on tour with the envy corps on tuesday morning after they play their show at the waiting room monday night. i will be doing a photo documentary on their tour, which will take us from st. louis to chicago to new york city, and many places in-between.

i will then stay in nyc for a few more days visiting with my old parsons friends. that is something that should be quite good.

there’s a quick update on my life.

oh, and sethwarrick.com is now live.

i love you.

i need to find these things that define this story. there is a box kept open for them. that is all there is, and yet i’m not there.

it’s been a year since i was last in school. that’s weird. ever since i turned 16, i don’t think there’s been one year where i felt like there was less change in my life than the year before. that is good.

i’m going to go ahead and take this time to dedicated the song 23 by blonde redhead to myself. it seems appropriate.

*

i have an opportunity coming up that i would like to label as “pretty sweet”, if you don’t mind. my friend, luke pettipoole, is the head man for the band the envy corps. if you haven’t ever listened to them, don’t feel too bad (their label is a UK label), but fix it immediately. you’ll be glad you did.

they are performing at 80-35, a music festival in des moines iowa over the 4th and 5th of july. the headliners of this festival include the flaming lips, andrew bird, and the roots.

luke is mostly cool because he wears non-prescription glasses, but also because he gave me a backstage photo pass for the entire festival. which means i’ll be able to possibly run into wayne, steven, and michael of the flaming lips, who have a pretty significant placement on my list of super-humans.

this also means i can take as many photos back there as i want. so i will be there with my cameras. i just bought a new lens which does incredible in low-light situations (but is way too expensive), and i bought some high-speed film for my minolta 35mm. i’m going to be ready.

while they are all incredible in their own way, yoshimi battles the pink robots is definitely my favorite albums of theirs. it helped me survive and work through some of the more down and alone times of my life, which were spent trying to grab ahold of some very abstract ideas and feelings. these times were largely spent on the upper floor of 13th street coffee company.

so this should be good, aka “pretty sweet”.

my pants are on fire with anticipation.

let’s do this.

todays answer to yesterdays ending question is no. we were made for community. that is not to say though, that we should not have times or moments of seclusion. that is something i desperately need at times. so it’s both that we need to have.

and i don’t necessarily agree with what i said yesterday when i said that i feel more inspired when i am in seclusion or alone. it is a different kind of inspiration, i think, that comes from community. it drives me to different conclusions, but they are not of lesser truth or originality. i value both kinds.

i am finding myself wondering with random thoughts regularly. i want to reach. there are these images in my mind that i want to create and/or find. but much to my deep frustration, i cannot realize them. i do not know how to.

just the other day i was watching the clouds move across the sky as i drove down the interstate. the ambient rumble and the motion caused by the wind flying through the car were there too. all of the motion, sound, and color helped me realize something but couldn’t yet understand. there was a story there. and all of me was content except for the part of me that wanted to capture it and share it. there is a story there that i want to tell.

in speaking about art:

when i am in community, i feel less inspired, less in touch.
when i am in seclusion, i feel greatly inspired, more transparent and aware.

what does that mean?

am i to sacrifice one thing over the pursuit of another?

these storms over the past few weeks have been incredible. several nights i have woken up to the noise of thunder, rain, and wind. i have a great view of the storms from my apartment. during one of the storms i went down to the garage, which is below the apartments, to get something from my car. to my surprise and horror i found my car, lou, sitting in about 8-10 inches of water. it was extremely close to the bottom of the doors. i quickly removed my shoes and socks and ran through the storm water and got in the car. luckily no water had gotten in the car yet. what a relief. i was able to start it and pull it out to another spot away from the water. it was ironic, as i was actually waiting for a friend to pick me up because i didn’t want to drive my car under the threat of hail. then i go down to see that. it was a little reminder that i really have no control. it’s good to be reminded of that sometimes.

i took a few photos of the last storm. i was going to send them in to the news while it was happening, but unfortunately got the wrong address. i still think it would be pretty sweet to be a storm chaser / photographer. if not before, maybe i’ll do that when i hit my mid-life crisis. just not in a porsche.

happy summer. don’t forget to leave your routine for at least a week this summer and experience some freedom. it is good for you.

read the conversations behind these photographs.

there is definitely a side of omaha that people ignore. the community to the north of cuming st. is very poor (according to observation and two locals, mentioned below). and in-between you have the deserted old storefronts and shops that are being threatened now by new development. i don’t really know why this happened. i’m just really interested in the change that is going on.

while i was walking around taking photographs i had two great conversations with two men who (i think) were from the area. it’s incredible how having a camera can act as a voice.

the first conversation began with discussing the lack of a bustling downtown. i’ll call this guy jon. jon came here for a job at UNMC. he brought up the how the historic photos of omaha captured busy city streets packed with people. it was thriving. and somewhere in the 1970’s it disappeared. what happened to that? i mentioned that there are a few (very few) small areas that are still busy day in and day out. specifically the old market and 50th and underwood. he admitted that those were exceptions, but still didn’t see any evidence of a growing city, at least in a positive way.

he asked me why i was taking pictures of these old buildings. i explained to him that i saw this area as a part of history that may not be around for much longer, and i wanted to capture it. i also agreed with what he had said and explained that i think the city has sort of gone into hiding. people keep themselves from community, and stay in their own little places. that, from my observation, is a weakness of the midwest. however, it does happen everywhere. our conversation continued on for about ten minutes, but the general idea i got from jon was that of frustration and a strong desire to move on to a larger city due to the lack of community and liveliness here.

so i continued to look and shoot and think. i was taking a photo of a beautiful wall when a truck drove by and someone leaned out and shouted, “it’s a wall,” as if to say i should go home, sit down, and limit my understanding and expression strictly to the original function of which all my surroundings are made. how dumb and shallow. hello robot. goodbye robot. end.

shortly after that moment of nothingness, i ran into another man walking by. we’ll call this guy derrick. derrick is brilliant. he loves mcdonald’s coffee. those two things are not associated. i was taking a picture of the wall of an old building and he asked me why i would take a photo of such useless building. he immediately expressed distaste for the manner of which the city is expanding and how he felt they were creating these new condos and apartments completely outside of what was in demand. i don’t know if i agree with that or not, but my goal here is to just share what was said. i love hearing different points of view. from his point of view, the city needs to bring in more large businesses before they build all these condos and apartments. he believes, then, that the old historical structures should be torn down and the space be used for these new businesses and companies. that surprised me a little bit.

derrick has lived in many large cities. he said that this one is by far the most racist and supremacist cities he’s ever been to. he said that the black community here is one of the most poor in the states. he believes there is racial discrimination in the hiring process, and that white people have solid grips on the businesses and processes here. he referred many times to the “good ole’ boy” connections that white people here tend to have, and that there is never really any risk for them.

derrick likes ron paul. so do i.

i think the underlying points that i got from derrick was that people here are quite clueless and racist, whether it be intentionally or unintentionally. he feels that the cities plan for expanding is not a good one. the stadium is a bad idea. rush limbaugh gives him a headache. and martial law could become a reality in the states at some point.

these conversations were fascinating to me, as i normally don’t hear from these angles. i wanted to share them just to share them. maybe it will create good discussion. our city is changing. i think we could all do better at becoming aware of all of the opinions and all of the conditions of the people that live here. (or wherever you are).

“derrick” and “jon”: if either of you ever read this and i have been inaccurate in summarizing our conversations, i apologize. please correct me.

more photos will come someday soon, hopefully.